Parenting - Walk the Talk

For some unknown reason children try to role model their parents as they are the first source of understanding the World. In the movie field most of the offsprings of the famous artist have followed their father's foot print. It is believed that the 'conditioning' happen when the child is in the womb. My mother used to read lots of scriptures when she was pregnant. I was influenced by her spiritual inclination later reading & listening about spirituality.

This phenomenon makes the parents very responsible in their quality of thinking & actions. When the child is small, we generally feel that they cannot understand many things and we behave loosely in front of the child. The fact is even a 1 year old child can make out many things although may not be able to articulate.

ANECDOTE:

When my children were very young we wanted them to be vegetarian and avoid drinking coffee & tea which was one of the practice in the south. I used to eat non-vegetarian food but I did not want my son to know because we wanted him to be vegetarian. This is a stupid approach which I learned later.

When my son was 2 years old I used to bring NV food to my house and eat inside a locked room. As an young parent thinking we are clever, I used to think my son has not noticed my act. This went on for sometime. At some point in time when my son was 4 years old, our pediatrician suggested to give chicken soup to our son to improve his health.

Me and my wife decided to let go our son to taste NV considering his health. When I told my son "You can eat NV now as I also eat". I was under an impression that it will be a news for him. But my son said, "Dad I knew that you are eating NV" which was shock of my life. I asked my son how he knew my clandestine act which I thought is a secret! He said "I knew when you used to eat closing the door".

This was a "Moment of Truth" in my life where my heinous act was exposed by my innocent child. I felt very shameful at that moment but learned how children observe their parents. From this incident I learned that it is wrong to conclude children are innocent and can't understand many things we do.

When the father is a smoker, he has already lost his rights to advice his son to be a non smoker. But it is a chance still the son may end up as a non smoker. Still the fact remains that the child will believe what their parents are doing is righteous.

In summary

₹ You are the first source of inspiration to your children.

₹ The learning from parents starts from the womb and never underestimate their ability understand.

₹ It is a very responsible position to be parents once you have off springs as every act of yours has an impact on your child.

₹ Your child will believe what their parents act is the right way to follow. If you get angry and shout, the child will try to imitate you.

₹ Whatever quality you want your child to emulate, you have to acquire those qualities first.

₹ 'Walk the talk' which means 'Practice what you preach'.

If you wish to have responsible child, better you become a responsible person first.

With whole of my heart

NC